“Try not to try, be like the sky”

A while back I found myself diving into an Amazon show called Undone. If you haven’t seen it and you’re into animation and explorations of consciousness, it’s worth the binge. Of all the thought-provoking moments in the series, one line has lodged itself in my thoughts: “Try not to try, be like the sky.” It speaks to something we all struggle with, the tension between action and surrender, between trying and letting go.

The paradox of effort

At first, “try not to try” sounds like nonsense. Isn’t trying the very definition of effort, action, doing? But the line points somewhere else. It doesn’t mean doing nothing. It points to a different kind of action, one that comes without force or struggle and flows naturally.

It reminds me of the Taoist idea of wu wei, which can be translated as “non-action” or “acting without effort”: moving with the natural flow of life and letting things unfold as they will. Less doing, more being.

The sky as a metaphor

Look at the sky and you see something vast, stretching past what your eyes can take in. It’s always there, a silent witness to the world below. And it just is. There’s no ambition in the sky to be a “better” sky or meet some celestial performance metric. It doesn’t agonize over being too cloudy one day or too clear the next. It doesn’t set goals in the morning to be more blue or hold fewer clouds. It simply exists as itself, moment by moment.

Think about sunsets. The sky doesn’t plan its colors or second-guess whether today’s palette was better than yesterday’s. It changes, and it’s beautiful, without a hint of deliberation.

We don’t have to keep striving to fit a mold, chase an ideal or meet someone else’s benchmark either. Just as the sky doesn’t have to try to be the sky, we don’t have to try to be ourselves. There’s real power in simply being, without all the layers of expectation and judgment.

Being yourself means knowing your worth without needing anyone to confirm it. It means putting down the weight of “should be” and “could be” and standing in who you are right now. When we let go of the constant push to be more, to keep improving by someone else’s standards, we find a freedom like the sky’s: wide open.

Control and surrender

Modern life puts a premium on control. We’re taught to plan, strategize, set goals and work tirelessly toward them. Determination and focus have real value, but there’s a danger in getting rigid, in gripping our expectations too tightly.

“Try not to try” nudges us toward balance. It doesn’t mean giving up. It means surrendering on purpose. We have agency and power, and there’s also a vast universe at play, full of forces we don’t understand. Sometimes the best thing we can do is let go, trust the process, and let things unfold.

There’s a lot of freedom in that. When we stop trying to control every part of our lives and loosen our grip on how things should go, we can actually be in the present moment. We bend more easily, and we’re more in tune with the rhythm of life.

“Be like the sky” suggests a wide, open awareness. The sky witnesses the world without getting tangled in it, and we can learn to watch our thoughts, feelings and experiences without getting lost in them. Picture the passing clouds as your thoughts and emotions. Like the sky, you can let them float by without holding on. Be like the sky. Let feelings pass through you like weather. This sense of detachment doesn’t mean indifference; it gives you clarity, perspective and peace.

Things to try

• Sit for 5 to 10 minutes a day and watch your thoughts, the way the sky watches clouds. What comes up for you?
• At the end of each day, ask yourself, “Where did I force an outcome today? And where did I allow things to flow naturally?”
• Spend time watching the sky. Notice how it’s always changing and always still itself. Where could you be more like that?
• When strong emotions or hard thoughts come up, picture them as clouds passing through your mind, and let them come and go.
• Once a week, ask yourself, “Am I trying too hard to be someone I’m not or to control outcomes?”
• Pick one area of your life where you’ve been gripping too hard, and try meeting it with a little more trust.